Monday, April 28, 2014

Lets be real

Lets be real

I will run into people that I haven't seen in years from high school out and about... and I am lucky enough that some of them actually take the time to look at this blog. (which is awesome. thank you for so much support) 

But I have them say... "Your house is amazing... I don't know how you keep it so clean with a kid"

Wait... what? 

Oh no no no no.

I take the project photos on the final reveal days when the house is clean. when Maddux has been taped off from that area... 

But please do not think this is how we live. because that would be a lie. 

I am the girl that literally throws anything and everything in my kitchen cabinets before guests come over to clean up the clutter off the island. I promise you. try me. open the island cabinets... there could be sweatshirts... mail... Lego's... books... random electronics just thrown on top of my pots and pans. My son is a walking tornado like all little boys. he is just like his father where he takes off his socks... and pants and just leaves them in random rooms of the house. How to people lose their pants so often is beyond me. I am still trying to figure this out. My bathroom cabinet is overflowing with make up and hair products any day of the week. And the play room. The play room. is not presentable 98% of the time. I don't even bother cleaning this before we have family over... because those kids are going to destroy that room... and I get too sad when I spend two hours cleaning just for them to destroy every inch of that room in 15 minutes flat. 

I am not super organized. I am scatter brained and I often start a house project get bored and start another one. I struggle with finishing a project to 100% I often get to 80% and get bored. I have to literally force myself to go back and finish it. 

I do not cook elaborate meals. We eat a lot of cold wraps in this house... and oatmeal. we could live off of oatmeal. Actually my husband is a much better cook. And I am completely okay with letting this happen. I do not feel bad about this. I am okay with not being the wife that cooks awesome amazing meals. I do pride myself on warming up leftovers. I am really good at that. or I make an incredible veggie wrap... or peanut butter and banana wrap. So please don't come to my house hungry. You will be disappointed.. Unless the hubs in grilling out.. then its safe :)

I am not the parent that is in a rush for my kid growing up. I love him wanting to sleep in our bed halfway through the night. I know this little boy is going to grow up... and he's growing up quick. and I just I embrace any moment where he needs us to feel safe.  I want him to be little... Because I know once it is gone.. I am never getting that back. He was talking about his "next" birthday party in the car the other night.... where I realized he will be turning 5. And I almost lost it. I am in absolutely no rush. I wish it would all slow down a bit.

I am not the mom that freaks out about germs. My son lives by the 5 second rule (his mom does too). I am okay with it. I don't run around sanitizing my kid... Germs do not freak me out. I have wiped my sons nose with my sleeve... hand.... whatever is close by. Its gross. but well... I really don't have an excuse here. it happens people. I apologize in advance.

I allow my kid to dress himself on the weekends. This means costumes. Sooooo many costumes. If you run into me at Target on a Saturday... A mini Iron Man will most likely be riding in my cart... well if we are being honest... he will probably be running through the aisles fighting pretend bad guys.... I am not embarrassed. My kid doesn't have to be dressed in the top clothes... or matching clothes. Because I love how imaginative my kid is... and I want to make sure I encourage anything he is this excited about... even if its just super hero costumes :)

I say bad words in front of my kid. I try soooo very hard to not do this one. I try so hard. But... well we do a lot of home projects... and well if you have taken an attempt to DIY something in your home... you know... swearing happens. Thank my lucky stars he has not repeated a one. But I am not the swearing police. And I understand other people may swear around my kid. I mean... lets not be a sailor. but you slip and say one word... I will not shake my finger at you. Or give you a dirty look. because.. .we are human.

I have told Maddux no more candy in the car and taken away his bag of gummy worms once i realized within 10 seconds he ate half the bag. To which then he talked literally non stop for 15 minutes. non stop. Like every time i tried to say anything to Jerry... he would Say MOM IM TELLING YOU SOMETHING. to which 15 minutes later I simply just handed the bag of gummy worms back so I could finish my sentence of... "I need another Starbucks"
Its true. I give in. when its convenient for me. Especially in the morning. I hate mornings... bringing me to...

I hate mornings. Like really hate them. I remember people telling me that eventually after having kids... you just start liking mornings. you wake up earlier out of habit. My baby is 4. I still hate them. I could still sleep until noon. however this little morning loving alien that lives in my home... his 4 year old self is jumping up and down at 7am screaming lets play!!!!!! and I contemplate smothering myself with my own pillow .... instead i get up grumbling and make the strongest pot of coffee imaginable... and walk around like a zombie until cup number....8.

I am the mom that if you run into me at Target on a Saturday morning... you realize I do not have it all together. because my hair is not brushed... instead i threw it under a hat in a terrible pony tail. I am most likely still in my PJ's... and if i am wearing make up ... its because I fell asleep watching TV Friday night... and still have yet to wash it off..

So if you run into me on a day where I actually have clean clothes on... brushed hair...and a clean face. I assure you. that is a rare day. :)
Those other days... I am probably running down the opposite aisle to avoid seeing anyone that may know me out of pure embarrassment. I honestly have done this. Ran from people in public.
My favorite is when I think my child is hugging me goodbye... when comes to find out.. he was just using my shirt as a Kleenex... but I don't notice until i see the sheen all down my shirt in public. Just beautiful.
Its really sad how much you lose your mind once you become a mom.
Mornings are rough.
Nights are rough.
Heck... the whole day... is rough

But... so very much worth it.

But my whole point in this entire post.

I am not a mom that has it all together.
I wish I were that mom. I could be that mom...
If i could afford a
Hair Stylist...
Personal Shopper....
Personal Trainer....
Oh... and a nanny. who lives with me. and takes care of mornings.

Heck... I would just settle to pay someone to come to my house on weekends from 7am-9am. so that i could sleep those extra two hours...

But being a mom is the hardest job on this planet. Well being a dad is pretty equal. You are creating this little human being... and everything you do affects them. Every single thing you do. And you over think it... and wonder if you are messing it all up. And then if you are like me... you open a bottle of wine and just stop over analyzing.

Kind of.

But its hard. and amazing. and everything in between.

But this little man... who causes me to go out on the weekends without my hair brushed and uses me as a walking trash can.... and if I am really lucky a walking Kleenex...
Nothing in this world.... makes me as happy as this little smile.

Any volunteers on that whole 7am until 9am thing?
I mean come on. Look how cute he is... :)

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