Monday, May 26, 2014

Dear Maddux

Dear Maddux,

You are now about 4.5 years old and are in such a desperate rush to turn 5. Everyday you ask if you are 5 yet. I am not ready... not ready at all. The time is moving so quick. My baby boy... is no longer quite a baby anymore.

I don't know how many times I have mentioned your imagination in these letters. I often find myself wondering if this will stick with you throughout your life. If you will end up doing something creative with that beautiful mind of yours. Or if this will fade with age. On weekends you run through every costume in your trunk... one by one every super hero comes out to greet us. And you are in full character with each costume change. You can play action figures for hours... and you recreate battle scenes between good vs evil. It's my favorite thing to listen to. I could listen to you for hours...
I hope you never lose this. I hope you do something wonderful with that beautiful mind of yours... I hope. Either way whatever you end up being... I will be happy... as long as you are happy. But I hope... you put that creative side to good use. I hope you don't lose it.

You still think the jet stream is Superman. You still love light up shoes because they make you run faster. You still salute Captain America when you see the American Flag.

You are innocent and pure. You believe in all things magic. You believe so whole heartedly... it makes me almost believe. The world through your eyes... is beautiful and wonderful... and I never want to look at it any other way...

You have such a pure soul. Its tender and sensitive and you wear your heart on your sleeve. You get your feelings hurt so very easily... and you will go out of your way to make others smile. You love complimenting people... and genuinely care about people around you. I believe that is something rare for someone at the age of 4. You are tender... and I hope you never lose this ever. Ever.

I started these letters to keep track of moments in your life. Capture the small moments... so that they never get lost... So here are a few things you are currently up to.

- You are currently in Karate, Hockey, and T-ball. You just started T-ball and I love watching you and your dad playing catch in the yard any chance you two can get... You had your first hit in your first game this week. Which was super exciting to us. Even though you didn't run to first base as much as you "walked" there slowly and unsure of yourself. You hit off the pitch and not off the T. And your dad was ecstatic.

-You have moved up a level in hockey and every week you get a little bit more confidence and slowly working your way through it... This week they had you pick up your leg and skate on one foot. I won't say it was successful. But you tried it... and it was such a huge step for you. To get outside of your comfort zone and try something new was amazing.

- You are about to test for your orange stripe in karate... The entire 30 minutes of karate you have a smile just plastered on your face. You are in love with karate. However.. they keep trying to get you to yell... and you say "But Ninjas are quiet" Your dad claims we can't disagree with your logic.. .so we figure with time.. you will get louder.

- You just started to learn to ride a bike this weekend, its bittersweet. This is a big wake up call for me. You are getting bigger, and mom is struggling big time. Even though I am so proud of you and so excited for the new adventures... my baby is no longer a baby...

- You have learned to write your name. And can recognize all the letters. You love learning new things in school. And you seem to really listen if Brittanie tells you anything. Pretty much everything she says is Gold. Like for example... Mom has tried to spike your hair for the past 4.5 years and you fight me on it... to where I have almost given up. Brittanie did it.. and now you love it and you want your hair done like that every single day. (because Brittanie likes it that way) It's the beginning of it fore me... i realize you are going to do things like this all of your teenage years... I didn't realize it would start at age 4.

- For me to get you to eat anything... I have to pretend to call Pam (daycare teacher) and have her pretend to tell me how to make ... everything. Then if you think I made the taco according to Pam's precise instructions... then you will eat it. I am picking my battles here... I'll just let you think I am talking to her about it... when in reality... I am holding a dead phone up to my ear talking to myself. But hey... It gets you to eat it... so in the end.. I win.

Maddux... you are honestly such a happy kid. Such an easy going... just plain happy kid. You have this energy about you that is just contagious. Your smile can brighten my worst day... and your giggle is by far the best sound I have heard in my lifetime. I am hoping that at the age of 18... I am still writing about your creative mind... your infectious laugh... and your tender soul. I know that I cannot slow down time... I can't freeze this age... so if you have to grow up... please always stay true to yourself... and whatever you do... make sure your decisions make you happy. No matter what, I will always be in your corner... cheering you on.

I love you, my little knucklehead.


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